Rage is at the limit now. One of the easiest things is to blame anything that is not immediate to you: politicians, political parties, the state, the whole world; and be ignorant or quiet at the immediate issues within the four walls. One could visibly perceive their moral convictions breaking at the extremest of points. The groups of students throwing verbal rocks at the few who wish to bring at least a small change in moral outlook, let alone trying to change the giant corporate structures that stand amidst, and not to talk about the widely prohibited Pro-Palestinian protest. Praise to the social media warriors against mass genocide; yet the same minds (not everyone), repressed hostelites, turn towards their hedonism or immediate satisfaction (in the name of societal tradition) and become enraged at the cancellation of a concert. The pretension and its successive materialization of being perceived as, both from within and without, an exchange value, has experientially made many a magnets attract (ready to change morals, beliefs, values) towards any that offer a higher exchange value. On the way to this materalization, it doesn’t matter to him if any moral barriers are there; his fluidity will simply change his morals for him, and he will pass the barrier.
On the academic front, the best of the best fail to convince many a temporary employee (teaching assistant) that a different method can solve an academic problem as well, or that the calculative and conceptual mistakes are widely different things. The chalk-and-board culture is lost. The lost art of student-teacher interaction, discussion on research and ‘life’ in general, is replaced with an email system. The instructor has been reduced to a presentation slide translator; desperately filling the class timings with ‘ethics’ to make up for the incompetence of the subject; but dare you speak against capability! they shall forcefully bury your doubts with their dozens of LinkedIn certifications (confusing it with pedagogy) and an experience in some roman numeral years. Absolutely mad respect for a few Professors, but the exception simply proves the rule, and they too leave fast. An only one book shop with barely any book to read other than the pirated technical textbooks. No way out for an all time low attention level: one course group on WhatsApp, second on Outlook, third on Microsoft Teams, fourth on Google Classroom, fifth on Google Drive. How to hide the emptiness of a structure? Make it extremely complicated, layers upon layers of nothingness, as if wrapping a small object with many cartons. Dozens of reports imparted upon students, never to be read. They are named ‘key to your golden material future’ so that not a single soul shall speak against it. Ideally, your key shall been in your hands (categorically, with Allah). Here, the mark of maturity is the peer-review of two things: use of at least one drug/cig, and prefixing-suffixing of a feminine-gendered swear word in every sentence. The answer to ‘Why have you lost interest in studies?’ speaks of itself. What largely comes out of it is a student who is academically crippled to the point that he needs a calculator even for a two digit number’s square. Yet, in all cases, it is assumed that the student is blaming the boots for the fault of his feet.
The tone of hostel supervisor will change depending upon whether you are wearing Shirt-Trouser or Shalwaar-Kameez. In latter case, he will rarely answer even your Salaam. The warden is happy that the sofa is back to the common room, and it lies dusty and unoccupied for months. It was the same sofa I had brought into my room to study comfortably. For a few months, I had stopped reading in my room because you’d get cramps by sitting on the broken chair. I yearn for an IIT-like Institution, Ken Thompson-like curiosity, Von Newmann-like imagination, and the air and blackboards of Princeton’s Fine Hall. But these are the smallest of problems and yearnings. So the realist headachial demon says: Man, you have not seen anything in life apart from the four walls of two institutions (probably the best of the country). You only have a few months to graduation. The personal material problems ahead of you will fuel mental problems anyway, so why disturb your mental health by hoping for any ‘change’? You have seen how large aesthetic buildings hide the collective mediocrity. Just do your assignments, prepare for the quizzes, be done with your projects, get a job, correct your sleep schedule, be consistent with your Salaat, stop wasting time on social media, and don’t you dare talk about change.
November 18, 2023
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